Domestic Discipline's topics - tribe.net

Ultra spanking

AlphaBeatHer — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 08:52:45 GMT

How to spank a woman

The first thing to be said is that spanking is a controlled activity. Whether it is for punishment, maintenance, pre-emption or just because you feel like it, the spanking needs to be done in a structured way. Spanking should never be done in haste or anger and without consideration of the effects.

Where to spank

The bottom was clearly made for spanking. It can take a lot of punishment without injury and presents a glorious sight when it is glowing red and hot. However, other parts of a woman's body provide suitable and satisfying targets. The inner thighs, belly, breasts and vagina may all be spanked with benefit for the spanker and the recipient.

The head and face are no go areas for spanking. You may give a slap on the cheek at times if that is your way, but it is not spanking and need not be dealt with here. Spanking should not be done above the crack of the buttocks at the back. The coccyx will bruise easily and the kidneys are vulnerable above that. With plenty of more interesting places to decorate with your marks, the back as a whole should be left alone. The lower legs, feet and arms are all unworthy of spanking. You may wish to punish the hands if she has been putting them in the way, but this is really a side issue and is best corrected by proper training in presentation and submission than by caning or strapping the hands.

Presentation

Spanking should always be on bare skin for three reasons. The full effect of your efforts will not be achieved if some of it is absorbed by clothing. You need to see exactly where you are striking and the effects of the strokes to be sure that your work continues to be completely safe. Finally you should have the pleasure of seeing the results of your work as you do it.

When she is told that she is to be spanked, a woman should be required to present herself naked before her HoH. It is a matter of individual preference, but in most cases it will be best to require her to present on her knees with her hands clasped behind her head before her HoH to be told the extent of her punishment or maintenance and to receive any verbal discipline. She may also be required to collect the discipline implements and deliver them to her man.

Not all spankings are of a specific number, but where they are it is a good additional control to require her to call out the strokes.

When the spanking is complete, she should again present herself on her knees before her HoH and thank him for giving her the correction or reminder she required. The thanks may only be verbal or could include an oral thanking service.

Position

The traditional over the knee (otk) position is fine for a hand spanking of the bottom and it creates a close, loving contact that can be very pleasant. It is not really very good if you are using a spanking implement because you cannot get into a good enough position to deliver well aimed and effective strokes.

To spank any other part of the body and to deliver a sound thrashing with any kind of implement you need to go beyond otk. The bed is a very versatile place. Face down and with two or three pillows under her is excellent for any hard bottom spanking.

Breast spanking is best done standing or in an upright kneeling position. Ensure that the breasts themselves are receiving the strokes and they are not falling on the ribs. Special care must be taken if she is small breasted and in most case nothing heavier than a crop should be used on the breasts. It will sometimes be good to have her hold her breasts up to be spanked.

Having her lying on her back grasping her ankles wide apart is a good position for spanking the vagina and the inner thighs.

Flat on the back is fine for spanking the belly. Do not go as high as the ribs or as low as the hips.

Implements

The hand is the most convenient spanking implement and the one which everybody should start off with. But this site is for ultras and the hand will never be enough on its own.

The range of belts. floggers, paddles, whips, canes, etc. is enormous and I will not go into them in detail. It is a good idea to stick to the ancient rule of thumb. That is never to use a cane thicker than your thumb. Swishy and whipy is better than heavy and thudding. Punishment is meant to be painful, but it is not intended to injure.

Some implements are better suited to some tasks than others. A belt or flogger is good for use on the vagina although some people like to use a wooden spoon. The crop is good on the breasts (remember the Story of O). Every implement that is fit for spanking can be used on the bottom. The cane should not be used on the breasts unless she is particularly suitable and you both know what can be done without injury.

How much and how often

Whether you limit the session by number of strokes or by length of time, there needs to be a fixed limit that you set before you start and you stick to it. If she misbehaves, or fails to maintain standards while she is being spanked you can add to the original tariff, but at all times control must be maintained. Everybody is different so it is not possible to specify a fixed amount of punishment as a limit. The guidance must always be to ensure that injury is avoided. Failure to maintain reasonable discipline will be harmful to your relationship, but losing control and going beyond the boundaries of what your partner can take will destroy the most valuable thing in your life.

Some people have daily spankings and sometimes even more than once a day, but this is the exception. It is more normal for maintenance to be once or twice a week. Punishment must be as often as it is needed and if there are too many punishment spankings there will need to be an increase in maintenance. The point is to get the session to be sufficiently painful to be a deterrent to misbehaviour and then the frequency will not need to be too great.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 1 reply

Female Disciplinarian

Becky — Sun, 18 Mar 2007 20:10:51 GMT

Hello everyone
I'm a mature woman who uses Domestic Discipline on my husband. He is spanked and submits to other additional punishments. I always incorporate some form of humiliation and embarrassment with his spanking. Our goal is for him to lose emotional control while being spanked. I'd love to chat or exchange email with other like minded woman in this group. Also, I'd love to know if there are any like minded woman in the Ohio area. I could use a coach/mentor on the mental aspects of spanking. ie. "Scolding, shaming, and lecturing."
MS Becky

posted in Domestic Discipline - 14 replies

Let's make a list...

Tue, 28 Jun 2005 05:52:26 GMT

...examples of discipline...

i'll start with my obvious choice:

1. over the knee spankings

ok, your turn...

;)

posted in Domestic Discipline - 37 replies

What's your number one kink?

Sat, 21 Oct 2006 22:00:20 GMT

Mine's Daddy/little girl. It fits me. What of you?

Don't list more than one! That's my only rule (but then again, I'm not a rule setting type heehee).

posted in Domestic Discipline - 47 replies

new here

John — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 04:18:52 GMT

hi, i'm a submissive male who's interested in spanking in a female led HOH relationship. I'd love to talk to people with simiar interests.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 1 reply

English submissive lady seeking domestic discipline relationship

susan — Tue, 22 Apr 2008 18:36:51 GMT

i am new to this great site and I'm trying to find out how to find like minded men in England. I live in West Yorkshire and have no idea how to make contact with decent, dominant single men who also want to have a 'head of household' relationship

posted in Domestic Discipline - 5 replies

I am a male who is starting to lose faith in this

Michael — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 07:18:58 GMT

Hello,

I am a single, well educated, white male with no kids and no wife and want to find a woman to truly serve and someone that is strict and change my ways. I believe in female led households and seek someone that is real.

I would love to meet someone who actually believes in this lifestyle other than a game. To find a woman who knows how to make me cry and beg for mercy...and serve her to the best of my abilities.

I am drug, drink and smoke free...healthy and willing to relocate for the right woman...for real....this is not a game to me...

Please be honest and real as I have had enough of flakes on the sites like some of the kink sites as no one is committed....which is sad...as every man should be serving women and up until the burning of witches...women were in control of this world..

posted in Domestic Discipline - 3 replies

strap on fun

steve — Sat, 17 May 2008 06:23:47 GMT

any bay area female who want to try strap on sex

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Question for the lovely ladies...

Wed, 25 Jul 2007 21:25:29 GMT

Please elaborate....

What is it that allows you to open up to a man? Trust? Is it what they say or how they say it?
Do you like when men come on strong or subtly? Dirty or sweet or both?

How do you prefer to be approached?

Do you like it when a man to calls you names from the start or is that something that he has to earn and work up to?
If you like the name calling, what names turn you on and what names turn you off?

I am sure everyone is different. And I am very curious, so if you wouldn't mind sharing, we would love to hear it?

posted in Domestic Discipline - 4 replies

The Society of Janus Presents: Dominance and submission; A Symbiotic Journey. Presented by Lady Hilary and The Marine

JanusPrograms — Fri, 16 May 2008 15:36:26 GMT

Sunday, May 25 at SF Citadel
2:00pm - 5:00pm (Doors open at 1:00pm)
$5/Janus members and affiliates; $15/non-members (you do not need to be a member to attend!)

Come learn, discuss and question with a 24/7 D/s couple that lives and breathes a passionate loving relationship of Owner/property. We will talk about 24/7, role based, short term, life long, with or without SM relationships and anything else your imagination can conjure up about the Master/slave D/s lifestyle.

About the Instructors:
"Let me ask you this…" is very often the way The Marine begins a dialogue of learning. Both Lady Hilary and The Marine believe deeply in opportunities for growth found in the leather community. They each walked into Leather some 19 years ago; they have been walking a path together as Lady and Marine since 1999. Their Owner/property relationship has taken them on many journeys of growth, passion, and teaching. Together they, with the help of their boys, produce regular Vanguard Retreats www.vanguardleather.com, and have traveled the country and Bay Area teaching for the community, The Exiles, Alameda Leather Corps, Santa Clara County Leather, SM Odyssey, Rio Grande Leather, Southwest Leather, Dark Odyssey and The Citadel.

About the Janus Xplore Series:
The Janus Xplore series is a presentation of several "overview" classes, one per month on Sunday afternoons. These classes are intended to give the participants a solid, high-level overview of one area - not an in-depth class, but a great launching point to ask questions, and really see the wide range of activities possible.

Xplore classes include: Bondage, Impact, Medical & Electrical, Emotional Aspects of Play, Psychological Play, Dominance & Submission, Sexplay & Sensation Play, and the ever popular Sampler night where you can "taste" these aspects from the hands of experienced players.

This Janus program is open to all attendees 18 yrs of age and older who have a personal, positive interest in BDSM.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Balance across the pond

jon — Sat, 10 May 2008 09:48:07 GMT

Hi, any ideas on the balance of discipline between the US and UK?
Whilst existing here slightly, hopefully it is growing?
Seems to be greater in the US and wondering is that is from some of the religous influences?
Or do you guys just prefer things that way over there?

posted in Domestic Discipline - 2 replies

Anybody from South West UK by any chance?

a1frenchy — Sun, 11 May 2008 21:34:04 GMT

I'm looking for some social kink in Bristol area.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Bed discipline

hound — Tue, 02 Aug 2005 20:34:13 GMT

I was reading through some things the other night and came across one that intrigued me. The fact of sleeping in the bed being a privilege. I have thought of this one before, have not used it yet.

So a simple couple of questions, has anyone ever experienced this from either side? I wonder also, discipline or punishment?

posted in Domestic Discipline - 24 replies

Collarme.com WARNING!

LatexHer — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 17:53:35 GMT

WARNING! ------------------------------ this site is full of fakes, liars and picture collectors! Not for real time players!

posted in Domestic Discipline - 14 replies

No Greater Honor!

rooty — Fri, 18 Jan 2008 01:10:02 GMT

There is no greater honor, than, for man; to serve and suffer, at the hands of a dominant female!

posted in Domestic Discipline - 1 reply

Book- Partners in Power

Knotsonice — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 22:01:01 GMT

I'm looking for the book Partners in Power, Jack Rinella (Greenery Press). Has anyone seen the book sold/displayed in the Bay Area? Has anyone read the book? Review?

Thanks for your help in advance.

Knotsonice

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

New here

Sun, 17 Feb 2008 01:47:27 GMT

Hi all,wanted to say hi and introduce myself. I'm 43 yr young lesbian,Dom in the bdsm community 5yrs this march. I'm single,semi-retired due to disibility,I'm a certified fitness caoch,bachelor's in natural health-I consult now,practice buddhism.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Seeking Bay Area leather Daddy

Wed, 13 Feb 2008 08:10:07 GMT

Mature, responsible Dad wanted for obedient son.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Daddy/boy?

Sun, 13 Jan 2008 15:31:27 GMT

anyone into a Daddy/boy, Dom/sub, domestic discipline situation?

posted in Domestic Discipline - 3 replies

new to Berkeley

sensualkiten — Fri, 11 Jan 2008 22:40:46 GMT

Hi I am a 34 year old woman interested in domestic discipline. is there a Bay area group that meets to discuss or mingle?

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Yet another Introduction!

EvilSeedlet — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 19:02:18 GMT

Hello!

My name is Phillipa, and I am an 18-year-old live-in slave in Oklahoma.

My Master is married but his wife has minimal control over me, and very little right to punish me. Things like that are all carried out by my Master.

I'm here out of curiosity to see the feelings and methods of other people, and to share and offer my own experiences (limited as they may be). Hope I can help! Any questions?

-Phillipa (Or Seedlet..both work)

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Advice... please

xBAYBEExBratx — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 16:27:57 GMT

me and my girlfriend are looking into domestic discipline and we are bothnot sure where to start, there is really noway we could goto meetings due to various work and college commitments, and would love some advice as well as a few personal definations of what Domestic discipline means to you. Sorry if i'm going about this the wrong way, but ive alwasy though, it would be better to get advice than to dive in at the deep end, and find yourself basically out of your depths. xxx

yours

kye xx

posted in Domestic Discipline - 10 replies

Introduction of another Canadian Girl

Sue — Thu, 25 Oct 2007 23:21:13 GMT

I am not used to the terminology used in this tribe, so please forgive me as I use what I am used to. I am married to a submissive man who does everything I tell him to. We call it a Female Led Relationship. Some call me a Domme, which I do not prefer, although I guess in the BDSM world I am.

I am interested in new ideas and people who believe that someone needs to control the relationship.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 2 replies

Father-in-law trouble

Hugh — Mon, 03 Sep 2007 15:35:57 GMT

My Dad has always reserved the right to spank all his daughters and that includes my wife. Is this common amongst many families?

posted in Domestic Discipline - 4 replies

New Canadian girl ...

bluecandy — Mon, 12 Feb 2007 00:54:55 GMT

Hi everyone,

I have been interested in DD-style relationships for several years. I have been in two relationships that incorporated some DD characteristics, but were mostly D/s in nature.

I am a strong, confident woman who appreciates a man that respects me for my femininity, character, and values. I am drawn to strong men who are naturally dominant without being arrogant or selfish. It is important to me that the person I share this type of relationship with is intelligent, self confident, honet, loyal, and is able to walk and talk at the same time.

As well, I am quite active - enjoying many types of physical activities - as well as committed to my career (Manager in health care). As much as I want a DD-type relationship, having a compatible partner to share other aspects of life is equally important to me.

I am a down-to-earth, kind, witty, and loyal girl. I love a good laugh and enjoy good conversation.

I look forward to meeting new people and sharing ideas....

D.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 2 replies

LOOKING asap

William — Thu, 20 Sep 2007 08:25:41 GMT

hi there;
available right now .emailme

posted in Domestic Discipline - 1 reply

My Men Will Do What You Tell Them!

Cindy — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 10:13:33 GMT

My Men Will Do What You Tell Them!

Good boys!

Male Sex Slaves For Women
http://tribes.tribe.net/sexslaves

The rules they've agreed to:

All males in this group must follow the sexual commands of the women in the group that are within a 50-mile driving distance. If she says, “come over to my place and take off your clothes”, you do so even if she wants you to get naked in front of a room full of people. If she says, “give me a massage and then lick my pussy”, you do so. If she rolls over and says, “now, lick my butt”, you do so. If she says, “pleasure my friend,” you pleasure her friend.

Within this group only the females are allowed to make any kind of sexual requests or offers. Male slaves must have a picture of yourself in your profile and it also must contain your location. These rules do not apply to the women in the group.

There is also a private "Male Sex Slaves for Women" tribe set up for women, and the males at this site are also their sex slaves.

This Tribe is strictly set up for free exchanges. Fem-doms offering services that are tied to “financial domination” will have their advertisements deleted. Likewise any other advertisements for pay such as for pay porn-sites, professional dating services, professional strippers (male or female), etc. will be deleted.

Nothing involving pain, poop, minors, or that is unsafe is required of our male sex slaves, but all safe and sane sexual commands from our women are mandatory for men to stay in the tribe. Have fun!

Male Sex Slaves For Women
http://tribes.tribe.net/sexslaves

posted in Domestic Discipline - 4 replies

available for sessions

Billy — Sun, 16 Sep 2007 08:33:21 GMT

hey tribe;
you anyomne who is i need of so honest discipline fell free to cotact me .limits respected always safe .guys or chicks drop me a email
Bill

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

looking in st loiuis

Billy — Sun, 16 Sep 2007 08:27:07 GMT

hi group;
if anyone is intrested in a give ot take seesion let me know i have a flexable schedule so anytime i am free
Bill

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Fundraising day a success

shadow — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 21:53:01 GMT

Dear Community, Friends, Sacramento folks, SF supporters, fellow kinksters, newbies, oldbies, and everyone in between:

We at Southern Cross central cannot ever thank you enough for the contributions you made directly to EDGES at our Annual Valley Fundraiser.
Many of you spent WEEKS preparing to dazzle us with your talents, classes, and specialties- your time and energy is appreciated.

We raised a total of $3,547.00- a new one day record!

*YOU FOLKS* did that- not us. We just showed up and fed ya.
*YOU FOLKS* are magnificent- and all of us kinksters are very lucky to live and play together so well.

The bottom line is that we are supporting our play space and having FUN!
Our pre-sales tickets were phenominal and paid for all our pre-event shopping- thank you for planning ahead and getting tickets early (and yes, those souvenir tickets will be returned to you!), and to those who came and volunteered when feeling poorly-- we are humbled by your commitment.

Our letter to the community is as follows:

Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.

From All Of Us at Southern Cross to all our Friends of SX, Guest Talent with their gracious donations of time and energy, and the countless volunteers who always show up and magically make these fun events happen, it is my pleasure to let the greater SF Bay Community know that tonight we raised $3,547.00 for EDGES.

We need to send a gracious bow to several people who put themselves out beyond all our expectations:
Steve Bower- you could charm the snake outta the skin, and the auction was a huge success due to you.
Viper- Your donations of time, the auctioned whip- and even your slave- made the night fabulous.
Waldemar- the poi show ROCKED!
Celeste- we send our love.
Master Bob and jan... thank you for supporting us and giving it your all (and your car).
Uncle Abdul- our favorite fluffy service tech.
Travis & Bruce: FABULOUS Gun Play Class- we are doing it again soon in the Central Valley.
Don- You light our fire.
John- Our glitter king.

Sol- thank you for traveling under extreme FAA conditions.
V- the coffin is GORGEOUS, the wood was shiny, and the danger was obvious!
Loyd- Paddles and pain, you got the best delivery.
And our own SX staffers Courtney (event Goddess, flogger queen, billboard breasts) and Vicki (photography, pain, humiliation, and office staff).

We have to thank you VERY SPECIAL belly dancing girls for one of the HOTTEST scenes of the night (dancing with a sword on your head is now my new thing!).
Thank you to the folks who donated the new crock pots, who donated the leather sling to SX, to T. for the auction donation of the Killer portable St. Andrews Cross, to smO for the tent loans, to SV for your tireless set up and tear downs, to Salty Dog for the auction, Strong Eagle for the canes, The great art that was donated, the knitting, the scenes, and the plethora of tears and giggles elicited during that OFF THE HOOK AUCTION!

From our DM's to our clean up crew, Set up guys and gals and the FABULOUS FOOD Caterers (SX now can say we have the BEST EATS of the California scene-- Tina's desserts are now legends, Elfin has always been a legend, Amy rocks and Cynthia knows her way around a knife), all of us at the itty bitty kink group want to send our HUGE thank yous! We look forward to the work party weekend for the new FLOORS in the "SX wing" at EDGES.
NEXT big party/fundraiser-HALLOWEEN! Saturday, October 27, 2007. Watch www.southerncrossca.blogspot.com

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

my introduction

Dolly — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 03:11:02 GMT

Hello all
I just joined this tribe and know I am submissive, I am not certain if DD is totally right for me. I am curious about it though.
I am currently a collared service oriented submissive. I have no idea if our contract will be renewed or not at
this time.
I see that so many of the folks on tribe are from the west coast area, I guess not to many from the rest of the
country know about tribe yet. If there are others in the south eastern area I would love know.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

introduction

Mon, 09 Jul 2007 14:49:47 GMT

Hi . I have had many D/s relationships in the past but often found the intamacy and mutual respect I wanted was noy present. Five years ago I met Michael we now live in a relationship as husband and wife which is somewhere between DD & D/s I find this works very well for me. I joined this tribe because sometimes i feel very isolated and freakish about our lifestyle so I am seeking the support of likeminded folks. look forward to meeting some of you.
Anna

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

I'm baaaaaaaaaack

curious_brat — Wed, 27 Jun 2007 17:37:19 GMT

Once upon a time I created this tribe... in the hopes of gathering like minded individuals who see the benefits of DD relationships, and either live, or hope to live, them.

When tribe changed their policies, I disappeared. I've reappeared now and I'm wondering... how's the old tribe doing?

How many of us are living the DD lifestyle? Has this tribe helped anyone?

I have a different name and I'm finding it quite a challenge to find all the tribes to which I once belonged... but it's definitely good to be back!

cheers! :)

~brat

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

23 SWM Canadian

Will — Wed, 30 May 2007 15:31:50 GMT

I'm looking for domestic discipline, be it in or out of a relationship, where I"m the one being disciplined. If you're 40+, I wouldn't be very comfortable with this, and I am looking for a female. Hope to find someone :) preferably close by, thanks!

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Looking for examples for 24/7 D/s, not M/s, contract

Lady Anastasia — Sun, 01 Apr 2007 18:42:21 GMT

We have found that more structure may help smooth our transition and perhaps avoid back-sliding and disagreements.

I will be cross-posting on some of my other tribes.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 2 replies

Dating or being single? Be positive and you will win your love!

Fri, 18 May 2007 04:04:27 GMT

Dear,

We are dedicated to helping black people to find friends&love&more. Join For Free to see whether it will work wonders! It may refresh your life, even bring incredible changes to your life! Do not let the chances pass you by!

http://www.everythingebony.com/ebonydating

You can browse tons of hot profiles&photos all over the country or in your local area, initiate emails&winks&chatting, check other's stories&blogs and enjoy many other online free services.

All the best wishes to you!

Our members:
BBW - Black Beautiful Women
BHM - Black Handsome Men
BBBW - Black Big Beautiful Women
BBHM - Black Big Handsome Men,
or any combination of the above.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

The main thing is to work up to it

The Time Being — Sun, 08 Apr 2007 16:36:34 GMT

I have never had someone kick my nuts for me-- once I tried to get a girl to do it, but all she could handle was a little slapping. With my balls tied up, it resembled a boxer's speed bag (you know, like in Rocky). When done correctly, it's more about shock and slight pain which I find to be very pleasurable. Certainly it takes both trust and technique. I did have a pretty intense orgasm with a girlfriend who used a leather whip on my ass and thighs, while I was blindfolded, occasionally hitting my cock and balls (yearning for the shock, sensation), then finishing me off with a blow job. I guess she liked me. I think I sat there in a lump for about five minutes before I could string together a coherent sentence.

I have done my own self-punishment in some form as long as I have been masturbating, which is like from age 6. I am not kidding. I used to entertain myself with nurse or Amazon bondage fantasies. What I have found is that if you start out with slapping, then increase the intensity as much as you can bear, you can take more and more. If you get jabbed sharp in one ball or the other it can cause the wrong kind of uncomfortable pain, of course, or just one big wallop right of the bat will take the breath out of you, but I'm talking about wide, blunt blows, steadily increasing, with time to recover a bit. Usually I tie my balls with string or a rubber band, but you have to be careful that the rubber band doesn't cut off the circulation for too long. You can do this by having a looser rubber band, or by tying a leash to the rubber band that you can pull to take the tension off. It is also a pleasant sensation to tug tug tug on the leash and make the whole package wiggle around.

If you cut off the blood flow to your dangly bits completely for several hours, you will castrate yourself. I do not recommend this, since most people prefer to enjoy the continued manipulation of their genitals. And yes, you can rupture testicles, but I think it takes ALOT of force and a sharp attack. Maybe there's something about increased blood flow to the area that allows more and more force to be used, since my balls get pretty swollen. I have got to the point where I have been hitting myself pretty damn hard.

I have tried all manner of novel approaches to self-induced ball busting. The element of surprise is hard to reenact. Once I tied a gallon jug of water so that it would swing into my tied, exposed balls while I was blindfolded. I set a candle to burn through a string holding it back. The problem was, I could hear the string snap, and it gave me a split second warning. Another time I put my balls on the rim of the toilet and let the seat drop on them from further and further away. I have tried hammers and cinder blocks. But at this point my favorite implement, and the simplest, is a boot. For added momentum, fill it with coins.

Last night I literally worked up to the point where I was racked with an orgasm that had me incapacitated for quite a while. Roughly the scale as with the previously mentioned girlfriend, but I admit there's an added aspect to having it done to you by someone else. All I did was to work up to it, take breaks to rest, intermittently fondling and teasing myself. And ultimately, that's what's going on. You build, and build, and build. When I came, the entire event took several seconds, rising like the pitch of a siren, finally wailing. I must have milked my balls dry, because when I pulled a quick jerk off today I hardly got a drop.

So, ball busting definitely flips my switches, but to each his own. There's lots of things that other people like which I don't-- I am very hetero on the continuum for example, though I am not homophobic. So long as you aren't hurting small animals or children, or victimizing an adult without their permission, or exposing your self to people in the shopping mall, who am I to judge?

posted in Domestic Discipline - 1 reply

Madame Gina Grant class on Bottoming

Thu, 05 Apr 2007 21:09:55 GMT

Society of Janus Class (www.soj.org/calendar)
SF Citadel, Tuesday April 17th, 7:30pm-10pm

From Bottom to Top
(The Keys and Blocks to Responsive Bottoming)

Do you want to be the kind of bottom that's on every Top's speed dial? Responsiveness is the biggest contribution a bottom brings to the scene, and Madame Gina Grant is here to help you shine. She'll talk about the key elements that make it easier to express your desires and needs while keeping the mood and the energy hot. She'll present different bottom archetypes and their typical responses exhibited to help you discover who you are as a bottom and how to effectively communicate that to your Top. She'll offer you tools to work with emotional concerns that often inhibit responsiveness, and help you make sure that your top is having fun, too! Come learn how to convey both your desire and your pleasure from someone who has been a skilled, candid and experienced bottom, so that you can deepen your SM connection, raise the heat, and be the best bottom you can be! All levels of experience are sure to benefit, whether bottom or Top.

Presenter Bio:

Madame Gina Grant's roots are firmly planted in the San Francisco leather scene, though she enjoys traveling around the country and connecting with kinky, kindred spirits everywhere. She identifies as a power-fluid FemmeDomme whose primary calling in the scene is to foster and develop deep D/s connections through transformative SM play, mindfulness and spirituality, and understanding service as a vocation. She expresses her commitment by teaching and volunteering for such organizations as Society of Janus, Good Vibrations, SF Citadel, TES, and the Center for Sex and Culture, as well as by maintaining her own personal M/s relationships and enjoying both the challenges and rewards that her extended leather family affords her.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

not new but hi...

Monika — Tue, 20 Mar 2007 17:49:29 GMT

...

posted in Domestic Discipline - 6 replies

Janus Xplore Series: Impact Play, with Mistress Reba

Reba — Wed, 07 Mar 2007 02:44:43 GMT

The Society of Janus presents …

The Janus Xplore Series: Impact Play
with Mistress Reba
Sunday, March 11th, 2007

Location: SFCitadel, 1277 Mission Street, San Francisco
Between 9th and 8th Streets, closer to 9th Street

Program, 2-5 (doors open 1:30PM)
Cost: $5 members of Janus & reciprocal organizations; $15 all others

Impact! The word has a bit of a “snap”, doesn't it?

Impact Play is probably the most universally used type of S/M play. Whether it's sensual spanking, stroking with a flogger, cane play, or full-out bullwhipping, people at all levels have an appreciation for the sensations produced by various forms of impact upon the body.

Our program will present an overview of many types of impact play techniques, including:
Hand Spanking; Paddles and Straps; Punching, Slapping, Hitting and Kicking; Crops and Canes; Multi-tailed Whips like floggers and cat-o-nine tails, and Singletail Whips. The program will cover varying styles and ranges of sensation (light vs. heavy, sting vs. thud) and how to do them safely. The Mistress will also discuss aftercare specific to impact techniques.

About Our Presenter:
Reba identifies as a compassionate sadist. A Janus officer and a private player for over fifteen years, she also works as a professional dominant.

Admission will be granted for anyone over 18 years of age with a sincere, positive, personal interest in BDSM.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

hi new girl here

Santas-Blonde-Baby — Thu, 08 Jun 2006 15:15:19 GMT

I like to be the one in control ;0)

posted in Domestic Discipline - 6 replies

Just to introduce myself

blueliquid — Wed, 07 Feb 2007 20:44:44 GMT

Hi, I'm new here and just thought I'd introduce myself so everyone knows who I am. I'm a college girl with a real interest and need for both dd and ageplay. Right now I'm single, but I was recently in a longterm relationship that included both those things and made me extremely happy. Things don't always work out though, so I'm back out looking for someone special. Because I was only in the one relationship that really incoporated these things, I guess I'd consider myself a newbie to this lifestyle, although I have a pretty clear understanding of what I want and need. I was really excited to find this forum, and hopefully I'll be able to make some friends and have some good discussions here.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 1 reply

Corporal Punishment program at the citadel

Reba — Tue, 06 Feb 2007 02:55:47 GMT

Tuesday, February 6 2007
8:00pm - 10:00pm at the Citadel

Pretty in Pink or Red: Corporal Punishment

Come watch male and female bottoms turn glorious shades of pink and then red, receive lovely stripes from the cane, and develop fabulous fig hues from a paddle or strap. Add a flogging demonstration, a bit of face slapping and (of course) some safety tips and this should set you on your way to becoming the pain- player you've always dreamed of.

Admission: $20

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Master's Den: Casino

mastersden — Mon, 15 Jan 2007 21:43:11 GMT

Master's Den The SF Citadel's and Maestro Stefanos' Original Community Building Celebration of Dominance and Submission.

MASTER’S DEN: CASINO
Friday, February 16th, 2007
8 PM – 1 AM

Admission:
All Submissives: $20
Accompanied Dominants: $20
Single Dominants without invite: $50

SF Citadel presents a revelrous celebration of female submission & male dominance for all levels of experience. Gentlemen indulge in scenes, the shadow economy, create an empire of connections, & accumulate dollars for Auction II in May 2007. Ladies, offer up your favorite scene or service. Den Mothers are available for assistance, support, & matchmaking. Come single or in groups to Master’s Den to socialize, learn & explore with scores of dominants and submissives.

Schedule:
7:15 Doors open for Dom’s Domain & Sub Space only
7:30-8:00 Dom’s Domain & Sub Space
8:00-10:00 Party Starts & Check-in*
9:00-11:00 Casino Play
9:30-11:00 Service Objects
12:00-12:30 Human Dessert Buffet

Work exchange needs**:
3 attendees for clean-up; Female submissives for: 5 door/locker shifts, 5 cashier shifts, 3 kitchen shifts; Male dominants for: 6 DM Shifts

For work exchange email mastersden@sfcitadel.org

Check-out http://people.tribe.net/mastersden & http://tribes.tribe.net/mastersden

*Arrivals after 10:30 will not receive Den Dollars. **Volunteer for 1-hour and receive 50 Den Dollar and free admission or volunteer for 1-hour and receive 500 Den Dollars with paid admission.

DOM’S DOMAIN*:
7:30-8:00
Admission: Free with party or $5

Dom’s Domain is a seminar of submissive handling. Learn about interviewing, testing & rewarding submissives at Master’s Den and beyond.

SUB’S SPACE:
7:30-8:00
Admission: Free with party or $5

Experienced submissives offer guidance and support to assist you at Master’s Den and beyond. Learn about being interviewed, tested, sold and rewarded.

*Attendance bonus of 500 Den Dollars & knowledge to get the most of the event.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

new private tribe: Dark Stories - BDSM & Fetish Erotica

John_Mac — Wed, 10 Jan 2007 12:37:48 GMT

Hi - Some here may be interested in my new tribe for posting and discussing BDSM and fetish-themed erotica.
I've posted a couple of my stories on my profile page if you would like to see the kinds of things I'll be posting on the new tribe, and hopefully we will be able to attract some other writers as well. All orientations and genders are welcome.

Drop me a note if you are interested.
Jhn

posted in Domestic Discipline - 4 replies

Introduction

John_Mac — Sun, 07 Jan 2007 22:51:14 GMT

Hi - I'm John a dominant male from the Boston area interested in power exchange lifestyles. I've begun to post some of my erotic fiction on my profile page. Please feel free to check it out. Constructive comments sincerely welcome.

John

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Hey All Curious.

Richard — Wed, 01 Nov 2006 12:11:06 GMT

Hey, in a domestic discipline relation ship as far as discipline and punishments are concerned. Any one out there use the cane or strap on the hand.

yours

smithy

posted in Domestic Discipline - 2 replies

Master's Den: Revelry 06

mastersden — Fri, 03 Nov 2006 19:36:43 GMT

MASTER'S DEN: REVELRY '06
Friday November 17th: 8:00-1:00

SF Citadel & Maestro Stefanos present a revelrous celebration of female submission & male dominance for all levels of experience. Gentlemen, come to indulge in scenes, the shadow economy of Den Dollars, create an empire of connections, & accumulate dollars for Auction II in May 2007. Ladies, we invite you to offer up your favorite scene or service- Den Mothers will be available for assistance, support, & matchmaking. Come single or in groups to Master's Den to socialize, learn & explore with scores of dominants & submissives -- witness & join a consensual, respectful & indulgent community.

The Master's Den Schedule:
8:00-1:00 Event
8:00-10:00 Check-in*
9:00 Talent Showcases
9:30 Objectification
12:00-1:00 Human dessert buffet

Work exchange needs:
3 attendees for clean-up; Female submissives for: 5 door/locker shifts, 6 cashier shifts, 3 kitchen shifts; Male dominants for: 6 DM Shifts

Admission**:
$50 single dominant without invite
$20 per submissive
$20 per accompanied dominant

RSVP’s, questions, or work exchange email mastersden@sfcitadel.org
Check out:
http://people.tribe.net/mastersden
http://tribes.tribe.net/mastersden

*Arrivals after 10:00 will not receive Den Dollars. **Volunteer for 1-hour in the SF Citadel and receive 50 Den Dollar and free admission or volunteer for 1-hour and receive 500 Den Dollars with paid admission.

SUB SPACE
Downstairs: 7:30-8:00 (doors @ 7:15)
Admission: $5 or Free with Party Admission
Experienced submissives offer guidance and support to assist you on your path as a submissive. Learn about being interviewed, tested, sold & rewarded at Master's Den and beyond.

DOM'S DOMAIN
Upstairs: 7:30-8:00 (doors @ 7:15pm)
Admission: $5 or Free with Party Admission*
Dom's Domain is a seminar & demonstration of submissive handling. Learn about interviewing, testing & rewarding submissives at Master's Den and beyond from Masters Tim & Jeff. Together Masters Tim & Jeff have over 40 years experience in training & handling submissives.
*Attendance bonus of 500 Den Dollars and knowledge to get the most out of the events.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Just saying hi!

Stewart — Tue, 24 Oct 2006 20:25:38 GMT

I have just come across this tribe in unusual circumstances. My partner and I use DD in our relationship and usually I am discipline weekly but tonight I annoyed Her and was punished. She used the thinnest most painful crop after I had been made to ejaculate so the pain was worse. I was then sent to the spare room to write a 1000 word explanation and apology for my action whilst weraing a 'Stallion Guard'. I discovered this site whilst looking for material. Hope to talk to all of you....and hoping DD works for you as well as it does for me. Stewart

posted in Domestic Discipline - 1 reply

Hey

xBAYBEExBratx — Mon, 09 Oct 2006 16:18:44 GMT

to all those at this tribe, i only found this yesterday, and would like to make some friend to chat with,xxxx

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Clarity

Sun, 08 Oct 2006 05:25:28 GMT

When my wife and I first lived together I established a set of guidelines for our relationship, defining the roles we would each have. I feel that these clear cut roles have prevented more than a few arguments. She is aware of what is expected of her and is also aware of the consequences of her failure to meet these expectations. Ours is a more traditional marriage.

My wife is responsible for the house. This is to include cleaning, doing the laundry, cooking the meals, shopping and running errands. Her job is that of housewife.

In her spare time she is free to chat online, talk on the phone, go to the gym, work on her novel or whatever else she may wish. She will also be starting college soon.

At first she had difficulty with the basic cleaning of the house. To help her with this I devised a weekly schedule. She starts in one room of the house on Monday and finishes the last room on Friday. Thus every room is cleaned once a week. While I do not expect the house to be immaculate I do expect it to be reasonably clean. It has been my definition of reasonably clean that I have patiently guided her toward.

She has also learned the proper way to fold my clothes and how they are to be arranged in the drawers and hung in the closet. I have shown her the way to fold the towels and arrange them in the closet so the single fold is out for easy retrieval. I have even told her how to place the roll of toilet paper on the roll so it unwinds correctly.

My wife is an excellent cook. She always prepares enough for the meal and for my lunch the next day. She packs my lunch every night. Sometimes she experiments with recipes. These experiments are not always successful. I honestly let her know how the meal turned out. I am proud to say the vast majority of the time I can tell her it turned out great.

She receives a set amount from my paycheck in the household account every two weeks. With this she is to buy the groceries and pay the utilities. This money is also for her gym membership.

As for me, I earn a paycheck and mow the lawn.

I am very fortunate to have such a wonderful woman in my life.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Hello - This is my story

Antonio — Sun, 09 Apr 2006 01:45:59 GMT

This is my history:
Some years ago, I got a new girlfriend. It seemed like a normal situation, but ever since our beginning, I felt something special in her attitude. Later...I learned what was so special! I recognized that as a man with a childish side
In some "minor" aspects my childish side emerged. After observing me carefully, my girlfriend, quietly told me one day, ?I will give you the discipline you deserve, to improve your behavior, and make of you the best of boyfriends, and, probably, future husband.?
I was amazed by her words, and amazed about all I was feeling. She was in charge and had authority over me. I just wasn't able do feel that correctly. But my astonishment was far from being finished. She told me in an imperative way, "Now you must acquire the implement with which I will discipline you - a good slipper. I will use the slipper to give you some discipline". I found myself looking for a pair of slippers; and I did a very nice package trying to impress her and avoid the promised discipline.
And I was confident, because for a week, or something like that, nothing happened. One evening I was at home, waiting her arrival, and preparing a good dinner, when the phone rang and it was her. She announced to me that the slipper was finally getting put to work. The reason was that on that day I simply forgot to phone her! I tried all excuses...but in vain. And finally I got my first session - a long and hard slippering that warmed my cheeks for hours. After the punishment, she told me, ?Let's go talk about your behavior. It isn't good for me and it isn't good for you and for us. You know that I want you to phone me at my work because I care about you and I like hear your voice. I will punish you when I feel you deserve it. And for your own benefit, I will write you a paper with the offenses. I will consider the punishments for each.? She did the paper, and it was very clear. I must tell you that I haven't had much punishments, because I studied hard her. However I got some...always long, hard and very painful. I can tell you that she had a very heavy hand.
I concluded the following:
1- All the punishments I received were effective and very painful.
2 - She was very fair and acted strictly according to the written rules upon which she and I agreed.
3 - The punishments were real punishments - without other motivations, as sexual, or sado/maso and similar. After a hard spanking all I wanted was to cool off my sore bottom.
4 - Punishments were administrated as quickly as possible and without fantasies. Of course she wanted me to assume a pre-determined position.
5 - The objective was to punish a bad behavior, and was never humiliating.
6 - Although the punishments were always very painful, I felt she was always sweet and concerned. She knew that the punishment would hurt. After the punishment we had what she called "time in her arms". When I was in her arms, she tried to make me see my offenses and what the consequences would be. At these moments the flow of tenderness was very intense.
7 - After that, all was forgiven.
Well, these are some aspects of my life as a disciplined man. After some time we separated; mainly because I went to Brazil to work for a long time But while together, we were a very happy couple, and our love was very nice indeed. Now I am very lonely. All I want, and need, is to find a woman who knows how to make me a real happy man.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 1 reply

is it always

sheryl — Sat, 30 Sep 2006 15:22:14 GMT

this slow around here. I was really hoping to find a good group of people to exchange ideas with.
Sure hope it picks up.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 1 reply

Hello my name is Sheryl

sheryl — Wed, 27 Sep 2006 12:24:23 GMT

My husband and I have been married for 21 years now. We did not start out DD. Wish we would have, that sure would have saved some hurt feelings through the years. We did start to explore DD some 7 -8 years ago I think, it was my request and it took me a while to tell him what I wanted. Even longer for us to explore it and decide what worked for us and what didn't. It was on again off again for a little while and it was made more difficult by his having to leave for extended periods of time with the military.
We finally got it right. Things were going great we were clicking like never before, our home was the happiest it had ever been(2) kids.
He had to leave for over a year. It all went in the toilet so to speak.
We both were so different when he came home. Still just as much in love but had changed in so many ways and our life with the military was changing tremendously at the time, so did our family. His mother moved in when we got back to the states. BIG MISTAKE.

Now its almost three years since we moved back and we have traveled some very bumby roads to say the least.
I have not been me in a long time, He hasnt seemed his self either. We talked finally thank the heavens. We are making our move back to DD where we belong.
He admits to missing the intamacy we had. The sharing we did. The bond.
I have felt so ungrounded, kind of like just going through the daily motions with no emotions. Like just hanging out on a limb.

This wont be easy by any means even though its something we both want and need. We have changed over time. Maybe not all for the best so we both have some habbits to break for each other and our selves.
So now comes the the hard part, for me anyway. Letting go of the control, putting my pride some place other than between He and I. Letting him love me again. Letting my self love me again. Taking down some of the walls I put up and feeling again.

Well now thats enough for now but hope that We will be able to share much more together as time goes.

Sheryl

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

would love some advice please :)

Amanda — Sun, 24 Sep 2006 22:07:56 GMT

My bf and I have been dating for 2 yrs and we have already established him to 'wear the pants' in the relationship lol. He has final say blah blah blah. But I still feel I need more structure (in addition to having him show me he cares) I wanted to bring up the topic of discipline to him (not neccasarily 'spaking', but consiquneces) I don't know how he will react, if anyone has a way preferably a discreet way to bring up the subject matter i would greatly appreciate it.
-Amanda

posted in Domestic Discipline - 8 replies

Raiding the kitchen for discipline tools

iris — Thu, 11 Aug 2005 04:48:10 GMT

The recent entries on the other list postings relating to food has got a question in my mind: What are your favorite tools in the kitchen to aid in disciplining or titallating your self/partner/subbie ect.

I first think of the wooden spoon (across the hands or backside)
Perhaps nipples between the hand crank beaters...Face slapping with burrito size flour tortillas (hey i'm mexican. I've always got thsoe in the fridge!)

I know there are a ton others...lets hear your favorite.

iris

posted in Domestic Discipline - 17 replies

Looking for.....

purringpussy — Sun, 20 Aug 2006 15:49:01 GMT

I am looking for a Domestic Servant to handle all household duties and andthing else I should desirer. They must be in the Sacramento or San Francisco area. They would become part of the household, would be taken care of (food, clothing and other things). I would prefer a female or T'girl between the ages of 21 and 40. If anyone would be interested contact me here or send me a email to mysticalenergy69@hotmail.com

Tina

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Paddles

Aprilgame — Thu, 10 Aug 2006 23:13:38 GMT

Sexy LA burner Robot hand makes beautiful wooden paddles from all types of common and exotic woods. Some have Burning Man logos, some have two boy or two girl symobls, he has others but I don't remember. They are hand hewn, sanded and stained cherry wood, walnut, oak, etc. Gorgeous treats for your naughty pleasure. If you need one for yourself or for a gift, check him out... er um... I mean, check them out!

http://california.tribe.net/listing/Paddles-for-Sale/california-us/e0df3879-5b75-4941-9f20-0a6bd349ab1b

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Moderator

GaryQ — Mon, 07 Aug 2006 00:22:45 GMT

It seems we are without a moderator once again

I nominate myself, being the Dominant Master type that I am hehe

Anyone else want to wrestle for absolute control?

GaryQ

posted in Domestic Discipline - 2 replies

breaking bad habits

Tue, 19 Jul 2005 22:40:09 GMT

i wonder if anyone is willing to offer ideas of how to go about breaking bad habits? i have a habit that i have been unable to break for years now... as much as i want to, success alludes me. The problem is, i engage in the behavior unconsciously, so it is difficult for me to impose self-discipline. And as of yet, everything my Husband tries only seems to work for a short amount of time. Inevitably, i end up right back where i started.

Help?! How do you break a bad habit?

posted in Domestic Discipline - 5 replies

elise sutton

locustgirl — Wed, 27 Jul 2005 20:04:00 GMT

has anyone tried elise's procedures?
any thoughts on her book?
for that matter, does anyone know if her procedures that can be ordered online are also in her book?

posted in Domestic Discipline - 3 replies

Shopping for Sissies in London and Cannes

Freya — Wed, 08 Mar 2006 20:15:10 GMT

Hi--I am wondering if anyone has suggestions of good places to send my sissy shopping while he is in London and Cannes for the next two weeks. I would like him to scout out a new collar, preferably a lacy, feminine one (not a fetishy, BDSM one). I'd also love to hear ideas on the best places to find great panties and girdles.

Thanks so much for any ideas!

posted in Domestic Discipline - 3 replies

Hello to all. I am an Oregon Guy Seeking a Domestic Discipline Relationship With a Woman of any Bodyshape.

Ken — Mon, 24 Jul 2006 03:05:28 GMT

Hello. I'm wondering if there's woman out there that's needing regular spankings? If you are a young woman you might enjoy the daddy/dom lifestyle. Young woman means 18 plus. Yet others of you might find yourself most comfortable in the naughty wife or girlfriend role etc. Only Our Imagination limits us. Me/? I am a divorced, retired WM 55 currently living in the coast area by Lincoln City. Well can we work something out? My email=not4everywoman@yahoo.com

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

DD

Antonio — Fri, 07 Apr 2006 13:04:45 GMT

What are the possible benefits of DD in an adult relationship context?

posted in Domestic Discipline - 6 replies

Orgasm denial

norman — Mon, 30 Jan 2006 04:54:33 GMT

HI I am new to tribe
Happily married in relationship where I control the sex (voluntarilty)
System at moment is to wait as long as possible and then make the coupling uncomfortable for my wife (once again both parties agree)
The best she has done is 5 weeks with no orgasm but we are getting better.
Best method seems to be sexual punishment for orgasm

posted in Domestic Discipline - 8 replies

My intro

Antonio — Fri, 07 Apr 2006 13:09:01 GMT

Hello all, my name is Antonio. I am portuguese, living now at UK (sorry for my bad english). Some years ago I was engaged in a longterm relationship in wich DD was apliedd.
I would like like share, learn with the other's experience, and understand better the context of DD. Thanks, Antonio.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 0 replies

Hello

Brigid — Wed, 15 Mar 2006 14:26:06 GMT

My name is Brigid and I am very new to this group, just found it yesterday. I have been living in a Dom/sub relationship for 4 years now and can't imagine any other type of life. I do work well I have a career but my home life is one of strict discipline and I love it. Just wanted to say Hi to everyone and hope to get to know you all.
BB
Brigid

posted in Domestic Discipline - 3 replies

What's the attraction?

Sun, 01 Jan 2006 20:35:42 GMT

Happy New Year everyone! To start 2006 off, i figured i'd throw a question to the group...

What attracts you to the construct of a DD relationship? Why are you involved, or seeking to be involved, in this type of dynamic? How does it make you feel about yourself?... your partner?

ok, so really that's 3 questions.

Thanks for playing! :)

cheers,
spankee

posted in Domestic Discipline - 3 replies

Intro

Anne — Wed, 09 Nov 2005 04:09:56 GMT

Hi,
I just discovered this group and really look forward to sharing information. I've just started a relationship with a wonderful man who's a firm believer in DD. I actually had never heard of it before, although I think I've always known that's it the only type of relationship for me. The more I read and talk to people about it, the more I believe in it. My(well I can't really call him HOH, because we don't live together, so I'll have to come up with a name) lover is teaching me very patiently and doing a wonderful job of it.

I work as a secretary right now, but am taking some accounting and business classes also. I love music, mainly from Broadway shows. I was married for about 10 years to a man who had no clue about relationships. There was no clear-cut leader, and our marriage was a shambles. If I would ever marry again, it could only be in a DD marriage.

I'm glad I found this group and can't wait to start learning more and more about this subject.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 3 replies

women only group?

locustgirl — Tue, 30 Aug 2005 19:59:04 GMT

does anyone know of a tribe support group for dominant women only? or for that matter, do you know of a support group that meets in san francisco? i'm looking for down-to-earth discussion on solving problems as well as sharing ideas.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 1 reply

List's Continued..

LilButterFly31 — Thu, 30 Jun 2005 22:30:06 GMT

In regards to S's Thread.. How about a list of Rewards?

posted in Domestic Discipline - 12 replies

pictures please

Fri, 01 Jul 2005 06:08:06 GMT

Being the spankophile i am, i of course love all the photos of spankings in our tribe album... however, i am hereby requesting (kindly, and with all due respect) photos of other forms of discipline.

Pretty please? :)

~spankee

posted in Domestic Discipline - 3 replies

The ritual of it all

Fri, 01 Jul 2005 17:28:23 GMT

Last night as i was writing in my journal i began thinking about what makes discipline effective. Whether it be self imposed disciplines or Dom/Master/Husband imposed disciplines... what is the one key element that guarantees their success(?) For me the answer is simple: consistency.

When i behave in a certain manner, there are consequences. When those consequences remain constant and unchanging... the behavior quickly ceases. When consequences are inconsistent, the behavior inevitably continues.

So for me i see effective discipline as a sort of ritual. The disciplining of self or another must be maintained. What i am trying to describe here is easily referred to as maintenance discipline.

A daily spanking, or a weekly caning are both good examples of what i mean. Having to write a daily report is another. Things that are always expected and always performed no matter what details of interaction or day to day workings of the relationship arise.

It is this ritual of behavior that gives me the security and confidence i need to thrive as His submissive. Without it i doubt myself and my place and i tend to act out (unintentionally of course)... in many ways i feel like a lost little girl without it.

Any thoughts, comments, or opinions on maintenance discipline and the ritual of it all?

~spankee : )

posted in Domestic Discipline - 1 reply

The Brat

Mon, 27 Jun 2005 22:55:42 GMT

ok tribe... there are enough of us here to have some discussions going, and yet this place has been dead for days and days now.

i was hoping that people would start to introduce themselves and that topics would be brought up that would only spur more members to speak up. no such luck.

so i will throw this concept out there:

The Brat

What is her motivation?
How best to deal with her?
Is she endearing or annoying?

as always, the satiably curious, spankee :)

*please note, my use of 'her' and 'she' are not meant to be exclusionary

posted in Domestic Discipline - 7 replies

To break the ice...

Tue, 07 Jun 2005 07:00:11 GMT

So it's late, and i should probably be in bed right now instead of playing around on tribe... but as sleep alludes me, i thought i would attempt to start a discussion. i'm just going to throw out a few questions, please feel free to reply to as many or as few as you desire, and i'll be sure to offer my answers... although probably not tonight. ;)

~ What does discipline mean to you?

~ What is your favorite form of discipline (receiving and/or giving)?

~ How do you distinguish between discipline and punishment?

~ When was the last time you handed down some discipline / you were disciplined? What form of discipline was employed?

~ Just what compelled you to join this tribe?

cheers,
spankee

posted in Domestic Discipline - 9 replies

To clarify

Sat, 04 Jun 2005 16:08:50 GMT

Hello all,

First let me say i appreciate the introductions and contributions made thus far. One day old and we are growing by the hour. i'd also like to say thank you to all the members for bearing with me as i figure out how to smoothly 'moderate' my own tribe. We all must start somewhere and at the request of my Master, i am getting my moderator start here. : )

i feel the need to clarify my intention for this tribe. i understand that there are many tribes already in existence that deal regularly with the dynamics of power exchange, Dominance and submission, and domestic issues at large. In no way whatsoever did i intend to step on any tribe toes or compete for attention from tribe users. Also, i didn't want to simply start another D/s or M/s tribe. My intention for this tribe is that it focus on the relationship aspects of Domestic Discipline.

The best way i can describe this is to simply offer a quote about the subject that i feel speaks clearly to my intended purpose of this tribe...

"You know what you want, even if it isn't exactly conventional.

The image of the household you want has been in your mind since you can remember, the image of a home where rules are clearly defined, boundaries are clearly laid, actions have consequences and grudges and hard feelings are unecessary because power struggles are nonexistent. This household you dream of is harmonious because it defies the politically correctiveness of the day. There are no power struggles or gender wars.

In this household, the loving husband/boyfriend provides firm, consistent authority. He appreciates and encourages the intelligence and accomplishments of his partner while setting up loving boundaries. There is no question that those boundaries will be enforced. How they are enforced depends on his partner. For some, a look is all it takes. For others, the loss of privileges is more effective. Ocassionally a spanking is needed to get the point across and bring her back in line.

In this household the intelligent, accomplished wife/girlfriend provides love and nurturing support and companionship while observing the authority of her partner. She understands that her actions have consequences and accepts her partner's role and guide as mentor, protector and disciplinarian. This is easy for her because she understands that he loves her and cherishes her above all others and that he will only correct her for her benefit.

We aren't talking about BSDM here. We aren't talking about Master/Slave relationships. We aren't talking about humiliation and degradation.

We are talking about real couples and real people making a conscious decision in a modern world to reactivate old fashioned values and measures that WORKED and still do. We're talking about couples incorporating discipline into real life. These aren't activities set aside for clubs and parties. This is a disciplinary arrangement that is much a part of day to day life as taking out the trash, walking the dog, paying the bills or coaching the after-school soccer league.

If this is not for you - if you cannot fathom the idea that a woman would willingly submit to physical correction (spanking or paddling) or other forms of correction (loss of privileges, corner time, etc) then go elsewhere.

However, if you are a man who believes in providing loving correction to keep your house in order or if you are a woman who feels no loss in dignity in submitting to loving male authority, then Welcome To Your Home On (Tribe)."

~ www.vickiblue.com/home.html ~

** i would like to add that although the above speaks exclusively of heterosexual Male/female relationships where the male is the Head of Household, i do not intend to exclude anyone from this tribe. i would like to encourage gay, lesbian, and heterosexual (where the female is dominant) couples to feel comfortable and welcome here as well.

Thanks again to everyone for having patience with a newbie moderator, and please feel free to offer any suggestions or feedback you think will make this tribe a better place for everyone.

: )

cheers,
spankee

posted in Domestic Discipline - 5 replies

My Intro

jay9 — Sat, 04 Jun 2005 07:53:32 GMT

I'm posting an intro here because spankee asked people to do that in the thread she called "Welcome".

Hello, my name is Jay. I'm 31 years old, live in southern california, currently employed as a mortgage broker.

My main hobbies are photography, making scrap books, gardening, hiking, camping, hunting, dog training, and skinny dipping.

It is my goal to someday have a total power exchange arrangement with someone who wants to live in my home as my slave. My idea of the perfect arrangement is very similar to the way bisubmaid describes her current arrangement (it actually makes me giddy every time she describes it).

I'm really looking forward to dicussing this topic with all of you and reading what you have to contribute.

posted in Domestic Discipline - 5 replies

Welcome

Fri, 03 Jun 2005 21:24:27 GMT

Hello hello! This is a bit nerve wracking for me, as i am not usually comfortable in the role of 'moderator'. However, i believe this is a subject worthy of a tribe and so here we are.

i would like to start by introducing myself... i am a married female submissive and my Husband is the Head of our Household. Domestic Discipline has been a part of our relationship for years and we both believe it is a great part of why our relationship has been successful for almost nine years now. my entire life i knew i wanted (or is that needed?) a relationship where i could devote my attentions to serving and entertaining my Man while, in return, He provided guidance and security. Accepting this about myself while growing up in the age of feminism presented me with challenges at times, and until i met my Husband i was unsure if my desire was even 'ok'. The DD dynamic to our relationship has evolved and deepened over time and today we are just like any other couple you might meet... we just seem a bit 'old fashioned' to those that are unaware of our proclivities. We are involved in many BDSM activities, but those are secondary to the fundamental structure of our relationship. That foundation being one of Domestic Discipline.

i encourage new members (as you arrive) to please introduce yourself and share a bit about your thoughts and feelings in regards to DD.

cheers!
spankee : )

posted in Domestic Discipline - 4 replies